I don’t do alcohol or pills. I get the same effect standing up. — Anonymous
Being old and ill puts you in an isolation that you never expected during your salad days. Your mind sends messages to your brain but your body refuses to respond. And the law of gravity is constantly pulling you down.
Things that you once did without effort and can no longer do leaves you frustrated, helpless. Each day looms large, knowing that you cannot spend it with activities you once enjoyed.
Finding myself in this situation, I try to think of others who are worse off than I find myself. And there are plenty of them around if you just look around you.
So I try to find humor in something that expels the distressing thoughts that sometimes invade my day. I found what I was looking for on the internet and it gave me a hearty laugh. I share it with you in the hope that it will lighten your day and give you a reminder that “things could be worse.”
“Upon arriving home a husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife. Tearfully she explained ‘it’s the druggist. He insulted me terribly this morning on the phone.’
Immediately the husband drove downtown to confront the druggist and demand an apology. Before he could say more than a few words, the druggist told him:
“Now just a minute, please listen to my side of it. This morning the alarm failed to go off and I was late getting up. I went without breakfast and hurried out to my car, just to realize I had locked the house with both house keys and car keys inside. So I had to break a window to get my keys.
Then, driving a little too fast I got a speeding ticket. Later, about three blocks from the store, I had a flat tire. When I got to the store there was a bunch of people waiting for me to open up and all the time the phone was ringing.”
He continued “then I had to break a roll of nickels against the cash register to make change and they spilled all over the floor. I got down on my hands and knees to pick them up and the phone was still ringing. When I came up to answer the phone I cracked my head on the open cash register drawer which made me stagger back against a showcase of perfume bottles. All of them tumbled to the floor and broke.
Meanwhile, the phone kept on ringing off the hook and I finally got to answer it. It was your wife. She wanted to know how to use a rectal thermometer and honest, Mister, all I did was tell her.
Have a nice day.
Save this for your holiday meals coming up.
Traditional Sweet Potato Casserole
4 and 1/2 pounds of sweet potatoes
1 cup of granulated sugar
1/2 cup of butter, softened
1/4 cup of milk
2 large eggs
1 teaspoon of vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon of salt
1 and 1/4 cups of cornflakes cereal, crushed
1/4 cup of chopped pecans
1 tablespoon of brown sugar
1 tablespoon of butter, melted
1 and 1/2 cups of miniature marshmallows
1. Preheat oven to 400°. Bake sweet potatoes at 400° for 1 hour or until tender. Let stand until cool to touch (about 20 minutes); peel and mash sweet potatoes. Reduce oven temperature to 350°.
2. Beat mashed sweet potatoes, granulated sugar, and next 5 ingredients at medium speed with an electric mixer until smooth. Spoon potato mixture into a greased 11- x 7-inch baking dish.
3. Combine cornflakes cereal and next 3 ingredients in a small bowl. Sprinkle over casserole in diagonal rows 2 inches apart.
4. Bake at 350° for 30 minutes. Remove from oven; let stand 10 minutes. Sprinkle marshmallows in alternate rows between cornflake mixture; bake 10 minutes. Let stand 10 minutes before serving.